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How it works

From spark to monster.

We're business angels. Just with horns. You bring an idea, we bring experience, tools, and the fire. Here's how it goes, step by step, with no form and no pitch deck.

Time to first reply: as long as it takes a monster to type. With claws, sometimes a day.

Idea and opportunity – glowing light bulb in the Monster Forge diorama

Five steps

What really happens in each step.

The home page has the short version. This is the long one, with everything you need to bring and what we'll do.

  1. Hatch the idea
    01

    Hatch the idea

    Something in your head won't let you sleep. A product, a brand, a concept. It doesn't have to be finished. It doesn't even have to look good. It just has to fit the monster universe and make you grin while you explain it.

    You bring
    The idea. A napkin, a voice message, or three sentences will do.
    We do
    Nothing yet. We don't know anything yet.
    Duration
    As long as you need. Some people incubate for years.
  2. Sniffing it out at the planning board
    02

    Get in touch & sniff it out

    You write to hallo@monsterschmiede.com or call +49 761 8879 4575. We read, listen, and ask dumb questions. Then we scribble on the board until it's clear whether there's a spark. This isn't a casting. It's a conversation.

    You bring
    Time for a call or a coffee. Cake helps but is optional.
    We do
    The Monster Test (further down), honestly and without slides.
    Duration
    One or two conversations. If it doesn't fit, we'll say so. Kindly.
  3. Forging at the anvil
    03

    Forge

    Now the work begins. We develop the idea together: What's the product, who needs it, what's the monster called? For that we use everything we learned at tapemonster and cardmonster: shop, purchasing, shipping, marketing, customer service. You stand at the anvil, we hold the workpiece.

    You bring
    The spark, your knowledge, your time. No money.
    We do
    Experience, tools, network, hands on. The full list.
    Duration
    Weeks to months. Monsters don't hatch overnight.
  4. Hatching – rocket launch
    04

    Hatch

    The new monster sees the light of day: its own name, its own brand, its own look. Ignition. Lachrolland cries tears of joy, Möh! tapes a strip around the launch, just to be safe.

    You bring
    Nerves. And the appetite to call the first customer yourself.
    We do
    Launch, first customers, first mistakes, first fixes.
    Duration
    One day for the launch, weeks for the fine-tuning.
  5. Growing healthy – monster with a rising chart
    05

    Grow healthy & stick together

    Organically, step by step. No turbo, no doping, no investor. We stay by the monster's side, like we do with everyone else in the family. And if it ever needs to sleep, like bagmonster, it's allowed to.

    You bring
    Patience. And the willingness to say no when someone says “exit.”
    We do
    Processes, numbers, improvements, and the occasional bad joke.
    Duration
    Unlimited. We live here.

The Monster Test

Does your idea fit us?

We ask four questions in step 2. You can ask them yourself beforehand. Four times yes? Send it over. Three is fine too.

  1. Would a monster use it?

    Product, brand, or concept. Not limited to print, not limited to paper. Just the monster universe.

  2. Do you grin while explaining it?

    If it stays serious, it's probably a consulting firm.

  3. Can you love it even though it's absurd?

    Or precisely because of that. Around here, crazy is a quality mark.

  4. Do people actually need it?

    Fun is mandatory, so is usefulness. Otherwise it's not a monster, it's a gag.

And the rights?

Open. Fair. Beforehand.

Who owns what, we discuss before things get serious. Not after. There's no standard contract in the drawer, because no idea comes from a drawer.

  • Different setups are possible. Equity, license, joint brand, collaboration for a limited time. What fits depends on the idea and on who contributes what.
  • Your idea stays yours until we agree. Telling isn't giving away. We're monsters, not sharks.
  • Everything goes on the table before we build. Better to talk about money and rights once too early than once too late.
  • No investor circus. No term sheet, no board, no hockey-stick curve. If you want that anyway: this way please.

FAQ

Before you write.

Does my idea have to involve print or packaging?

No. Anything crazy that fits the monster universe. Tape and cards were the beginning, not the limit.

What does it cost me?

Money: nothing. We don't want any and don't give any. Time, nerves, and cake: yes. What we contribute and what you contribute, we settle in step 2.

Do I need a concept or a business plan?

No. Three sentences will do. If you already have more, great. Pitch decks get folded, see Invest.

How fast will I get an answer?

Usually within a day or two. We're a small team, Mon–Fri. If Lachrolland answers, it can take longer; he likes writing punchlines.

What if you don't like the idea?

Then we'll tell you honestly and explain why. Monsters don't lie. Maybe it fits somewhere else, maybe it needs another round of incubating.

Can I just hand over an idea without joining in?

You can. Then we'll talk about what it's worth to you and to us. But honestly: the best monsters are born when the idea's owner stands at the anvil too.

Where is all this in short?

On the home page, five steps in five sentences. And in the incubator, where something is wobbling right now.

Got a spark? Then go.

No form, no pitch deck. Write us three sentences or call. We answer as fast as a monster can type.

Green and blue monster arm in arm

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