The Monster Code

Five rules, no fine print.

Other companies have values. We have a code. The difference: values hang on the wall, a code applies. Five rules every monster in the forge signs. With its paw.

Go sign it How it works

What defines us fits on one hand. With claws.

Black Monster Forge monster holding a glowing green heart

§1

A monster doesn't lie.

There's simply no room behind the teeth.

What it means

Honest and transparent, even when it's uncomfortable.
If an idea doesn't work, we say so. With reasons, not with attitude.
Prices, lead times, limits: right where you'd look for them.
Mistakes? They happen. They get admitted, then fixed.

What it doesn't mean

That we're rude. Honest and friendly aren't mutually exclusive.
That we spill everything. What's in the egg stays in the egg.

“I tried lying once. A laugh came out instead.” Lachrolland

§2

A monster delivers.

Monster service means fast, personal, and we never leave you in a dead zone.

What it means

Emails get answered. By humans, not bots. At tapemonster and cardmonster Mon–Fri, 8 am to 5 pm.
What's promised arrives. If not, we tell you before, not after.
Small order, big order: same service.

What it doesn't mean

That we're available around the clock. Monsters sleep too. Some for a very long time, see bagmonster.

“I deliver everything. Even if I get stuck to the door doing it.” Möh!

§3

A monster doesn't cut corners.

Whatever leaves the forge has to pass our own taste. And we are very hard to impress.

What it means

Every print file goes through the free artwork check before anything gets printed.
Material that isn't up to par doesn't get sold. Even if it would be cheaper.
Quality before speed. Speed on top, gladly, but never instead.

What it doesn't mean

That everything is perfect. Monsters are a little crooked. That's character, not sloppiness.

“I found a pixel. One. It had to go.” Control Monster, cardmonster

§4

A monster grows healthy.

Organic, not inflated. No hockey-stick curves, no doping, no investor.

What it means

We grow from what we earn. Not from what someone promises.
A new monster comes when the old one stands on its own. Not before.
Numbers interest us, bragging doesn't. That's why there are none here.

What it doesn't mean

That we want to stay small. We just don't want to pop.
That investors are evil. They're just not our thing. In detail here.

“Grown healthy. Like a well-fed monster.” The Forge, to every question about numbers

§5

A monster laughs.

Mostly at itself. Lachrolland makes sure of it.

What it means

The headline tells the truth, the subline grins. That's how we write everything.
Our humor has no limit, except one: never at our customers' expense.
Whoever works here may make jokes. Bad ones too. Especially bad ones.